So the other day we were sitting around talking about the names we’ve picked out for the baby, both boy and girl. And while we have a backup boy name just in case – as CB puts it – “He doesn’t look at all like a __________(fill in the blank)”, we don’t have a backup girl name.
Which is totally fine with me, because I love the names we’ve picked out and babies look half-baked when they come out anyway, and so they’ll look like whatever we name it? Is my theory. Mother of the year.
However, apparently my mother-in-law doesn’t agree and is stressing about it on our behalf. And so she and CB sat on their phones looking up Irish girl names while I ate goldfish crackers and wondered when I could nap.
MIL: “What about Maeve?”
Me: “Like Maeve Binchy? She wrote ‘Circle of Friends.’”
MIL: “Um, ok. I just think it’s pretty.”
Me: “There’s already a Nora on my side of the family, my cousin’s daughter. It’s cute. But no.”
Me: “It’s cute…but no.”
Me: “Like Ciara the singer? No.”
Me: “Cute, but no.”
Me: “Um, no.”
Me: “You’re clearly just messing with me. And no.”
Me: “I like Claire. But not more than I like what we already have. So no.”
Me: “Like from The Facts of Life?”
MIL, looking confused, looking at CB for help, then me: “Uh, what?”
Me: “You know, The Facts of Life, the 80s tv show?”
MIL, blank stare.
Me, to CB: “You know The Facts of Life!”
CB: “Yeah, but I don’t know what their names were.”
Me, singing: “You take the good you take the bad you take ‘em both and there you have the facts of life…the facts of life!”
MIL: “Um…what does that have to do with Blair?”
Me: “Blair! She was the blonde, snotty one. And there was Jo, the tomboy, Natalie, the funny one, and Tutti, the one on rollerskates.”
MIL: “Oh yeah, I know what you’re talking about now. I didn’t realize her name was Blair.”
MIL: “So…..”Me: “No.”MIL: “I think I’m going to swtich over to looking at dinner récipes for the week. This is exhausting.”
CB: “Welcome to my life.”